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Friday, October 19, 2007

Smokey Briggs

Sage Views

By Smokey Briggs

Stupidity is
in the water

There's something in the water.

There has to be. A whole nation cannot go insane all at once, can it? Can stupidity become so common that it becomes, well, normal? Can common sense become so uncommon that it is seen as insanity?

I'm beginning to think so.

Check this out:

Last week the national talking-head media went ape over a "prevented Columbine massacre" when some 14-year-old kid's room was raided before he went on a "killing spree."

Stacks of evil-looking guns and knives were filmed with cops standing by looking every bit like they had found the mother lode of killing instruments.

The word "arsenal" was repeated again and again in the overly dramatic tones that television reporters seem to be schooled in.

Alas, even from the video it was obvious that most if not all of the guns in question were plastic-BB-firing airsoft guns.

Two day's later I finally found one article that actually reported the facts and casually mentioned that only one actual firearm was found in this arsenal, and it was chambered in 9mm (a pistol caliber although the weapon was claimed to be an assault rifle), and was purchased by his mother (his parent knew he had it) and he had no ammunition for it.

Now, how stupid does a cop or reporter have to be not to notice that, "Hey, this thing only fires BB's?"

Mom is now under indictment because she "supplied" the kid with a gun.

I know I feel a lot safer now.

However, I can one up this scenario right now. My girls both have guns, and (this is for all you knee wobblers who prefer your rape victims unarmed) I taught/am teaching them how to use them effectively (as in to kill things that need killing).

In other news of absolute idiocy:

Al Gore was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for his "work" exposing the evil of global warming. Frankly, I simply do not understand why he did not get it for inventing the Internet many years back.

Not to be outdone by Gore, Hillary Clinton has proposed that the Government give every new baby $5,000. Wow, what a great idea! Hey, if $5,000 is good, would not $10,000 be better? But why stop there? Why not $50,000, you stingy old nanny goat? Why not $100,000? Somebody please tell me what is wrong with this line of non-reasoning. Please.

And, according to a CBS poll, 87 percent of Americans support expanding the S-CHIP medical coverage to more kids. Folks, like all socialist plans, it sounds great, but does not work.

You want socialized medicine? Really? Go try and get your life saved in Canada or any of the other nations where the communists won this battle. The care is pathetic. The care is rationed. They come here for treatment.

Can you guess why?

Anyway, the following floated across my email desk yesterday, and it illustrates the silliness of our world as well as anything I have seen lately. It is not politically correct, or sensitive, or even nice.

And, that is fine with me because one of the greatest problems we face in this world of stupidity is our unwillingness to freely express ourselves in public.

The following is titled, "1967 and Today."

* Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.

1967 - Vice principal comes over to look at Jack's shotgun. He goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

2007 - School goes into lock-down, and FB I is called. Jack is hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

* Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1967 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.

2007 - Police called. SWAT team arrives. Johnny and Mark are arrested and charged with assault. Both are expelled even though Johnny started it. * Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1967 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the principal. He returns to class, sits still, and does not disrupt class again.

2007 - Jeffrey is diagnosed with ADD and given huge doses of ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from State because Jeffrey has a learning disability.

* Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his dad gives him a whipping with his belt and forces him to get a part-time job and pay for the damage.

1967 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is placed in foster care and joins a gang. A state psychologist convinces Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself, and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist after family goes broke under the weight of legal fees.

* Scenario: Mark has a headache and brings some aspirin to school.

1967 - Mark takes aspirin in lunchroom and headache goes away.

2007 - Police called. Mark is expelled from school for drug violations.

His car is searched for drugs and weapons.

Television news runs a segment decrying young people's disregard for warnings about the dangers of drug abuse and the handwringers wonder what went wrong.

* Scenario: Pedro fails English in high school. 1967 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.

2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by the state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist.

ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. Curriculum standards are lowered and programs for advanced students are removed so that no child feels bad about himself and no child is left behind. Pedro is given a diploma but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot use the English language effectively.

* Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a fire ant hill.

1967 - Ants die.

2007 - Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, Homeland Security, and FBI called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates parents; siblings are removed from home; computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad goes on Terror Watch List and is never allowed to fly again.

* Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher who hugs him to comfort him.

1967 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2007 - Teacher is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in state prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy.

I am sure that the original author of "1967 and Today" meant it to be humorous as well as a political statement. Against the backdrop of current headlines, it is hard to laugh.

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