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Wednesday, November 6, 1996


By Jerry Hulsey

Teachers accustomed to their own environment

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Aside from blondes, the most gullible segment of our society has to be
our school teachers. If I were a salesman, I would prey on nothing but
teachers and with unquestionable success.

We as teachers are so accustomed to our environment of credibility -
that what we say is to be learned and remembered for its value - that if
it's found on a printed page or uttered from the lips of a literate
person - then it has to be believed.

I fell victim today - so naively - after being out of the classroom for
seven years.

I dropped by the departmental office of the college to use the copy
machine and was chatting with my ex-professor of Spanish. I had carried
him a cartoon for his bulletin board, and he was telling me about a
bumper sticker he had seen in Spanish - which loses its punch when
translated into English, but reads, "Better a Recognized Drunk than an
Anonymous Alcoholic."

"Speaking of alcohol," he begins, "You know that drink they make with
orange juice and vodka - it's called a screwdriver isn't it?"

"Yes," I reply, "I've heard of it."

"Well, he continues, "In the rest home where my mom is, they're serving
those old folks one every evening before bedtime to calm them down and
help them sleep, and it's effective.

I butted in to remark that the doctor prescribed a glass of wine every
night for my grandmother, but the nurses gave her orange juice and they
drank the wine." He laughed and continued, "But this screwdriver I was
telling you about is altered a little. They mix in a teaspoonful of Milk
of Magnesia and call it a Phillips Screwdriver.

Not until the punch line did I realize it was a joke, but I tried to
maintain my composure with this rebuttal.

Well, I never drank Vodka, but I used to mix Tequila with carrot juice.
That way if I got drunk, I could still see how to get home.

Jerry Hulsey is a former school teacher who writes for fun!
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Copyright 1996 by Pecos Enterprise
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324 S. Cedar St., Pecos, TX 79772
Phone 915-445-5475, FAX 915-445-4321

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